39. The five major functions and developmental stages of the family, and the importance of internal communication.
From a traditional perspective, the family system has five main functions: economic function, procreation, sexual relations, education of offspring, and emotional bond. The division of labor often allows each individual's skills to be fully utilized. Procreation and sexual relations are consecutive concepts. Through a stable family structure, adult men can satisfy their sexual needs while simultaneously procreating for survival. The family's educational function refers to the parents' education of their children, enabling them to inherit cultural knowledge and personal values, thus nurturing their future role in society. Emotional bond is considered a function of the family because it also provides mutual emotional influence and support.
In order for society to continue, the family often serves as an emotional pillar and a fortress of emotional protection in times of tension. When this emotional pillar is replaced by family conflict, individual family members face a certain enormous and predictable state of tension.
The relationship between stress and illness has been demonstrated in several studies: the presence of stressful factors within a family greatly increases the likelihood of family members developing illnesses. For example, a family crisis may precede an infectious disease outbreak; streptococcal infections are more than four times more common than other types of infectious diseases. One study found that 76% of sudden cardiac deaths in emergency rooms occurred during a major family crisis before the onset of the illness. While this phenomenon is not sufficient to prove that family stress causes heart disease, it does illustrate how family crises can disrupt the balance of the entire family, making them unable to control their stress. A "Life Events Survey" listed the most impactful factors on family life, and the first question was "Spouse's Death," indicating that it is the most significant cause of family crises. Of the top ten "life events" listed in the questionnaire, six were closely related to family crises, such as spouse's death, divorce, separation, death of a family member, marriage, and marital reconciliation. In addition, family arguments, conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, between parents-in-law and son-in-law, disharmony in sexual life, and children leaving home after adulthood are all contributing factors to stress.
Every family crisis creates a tense atmosphere, hindering a family from fulfilling its normal functions. Family conflict also significantly increases the likelihood of illness. Researchers have found that approximately 75% of cancer patients experienced the death of a close relative within two years prior to their diagnosis. Couples married for 25 years or longer are more likely to experience illness if one spouse dies soon after, or within 15 months of the deceased spouse. This vividly illustrates the importance of dependence on other family members and the significant stress caused by death. In short, families that can fulfill their normal functions are healthy; otherwise, problems exist and adjustments are needed.
Family development stages
Happiness is a sweet feeling, and almost everyone has experienced it. The highest pursuit in family life is to achieve happiness.
In the process of family development and evolution, each stage inevitably brings about corresponding family changes. These changes include: changes in rules, variations in the depth of emotional investment and giving, changes in the length of time family members spend together, and changes in the types of stress. These changes affect the family's present and future. Generally speaking, each stage in the family's development has its unique problems. To fully understand these problems and find solutions, it is essential to understand the different stages of a family's development. The family development process includes the following main stages:
The first stage: union. This includes ① courtship; ② marriage.
Phase Two: Expansion. This includes ① the birth of the first child; ② the birth of the second or last child; ③ the first child starting school; ④ the onset of puberty in the child.
The third stage: separation. This includes ① children leaving home; ② family emptiness in middle age, while still having a spouse.
Phase Four: End. This includes ① retirement; ② death.
Scientists refer to the various roles and responsibilities people play in social life as "roles." These roles differ at each specific stage of life. A couple's sexual relationship differs before and after marriage, and after the birth of their first child. Especially after a child enters the family, spontaneous sexual activity decreases, while planned activity increases significantly. Each new family member requires all family members to spend more time, emotionally, and with greater interest in interacting and engaging with each other. When children enter school or reach adolescence and begin to challenge traditional social values, they bring new information and experiences to the family. At this time, the family may resist the input of new ideas and consciousness from outside, or try to accommodate them. External pressure can easily lead to tension within the family. Within the family, the conflict between traditional values and new experiences is often considered a major source of family disputes.
Middle age can lead to concerns about sexual function, a spouse's affection or respect, and a focus on whether life is fulfilling and meaningful. Retirement and the passing of a spouse or close friend can cause intense feelings of loneliness, making it even more difficult to seek emotional support in old age.
In the natural development of a family, as a system, it may function well under certain conditions, or it may become unstable or even completely disintegrate. Unemployment, alcoholism, chronic illness, the birth of a disabled child, and so on, can all greatly affect the normal functioning of family life and communication.
Each family has different abilities and approaches to deal with the factors that lead to family crises. Men also handle family tensions very differently. They seek solutions based on the causes of the crisis, but ultimately, the goal is to alleviate family stress.
Good family communication
Families vary greatly, with lifestyles and routines often differing significantly. While each family has its own methods for coping with societal challenges, they generally rely on a single channel: the two-way communication system between the husband and wife. Language, as a means of communication and information exchange between two thinking, individual individuals, can either amplify or alleviate tension. Psychologists have conducted extensive research on how to eliminate family tension within this system, and people are constantly seeking an ideal family structure that can effectively mitigate various internal and external pressures.
Most researchers agree that so-called "open" family systems offer numerous advantages in coping with various difficulties and pressures. The most prominent characteristic of this family system is openness of opinion. Both partners feel a responsibility and interest in discussing issues of common concern, even those with differing opinions; the couple trusts and understands each other without fear of retaliation or punishment. Men living in such families are not hesitant to discuss topics that might seem dangerous to outsiders, replacing melancholy and distress with open communication and cheerful conversation. Researchers have found that this lifestyle promotes men's mental health and significantly reduces morbidity. Some even assert that good health is a hallmark of effectively managing family issues.
Change and crisis are part of life. What men don't understand is why, against the backdrop of change and crisis, one family thrives while another struggles to survive. In a family that functions well even under stressful circumstances, both spouses understand the importance of mutual respect, each family member has clear expectations for life, and their psychological needs are part of societal needs. Sometimes, families that adapt to external pressures also face challenges because the nature and scale of those pressures are constantly changing. Therefore, a family's ability to adapt to changing pressures is crucial.